visionshadows (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
visionshadows) wrote2005-11-30 01:02 pm
visionshadows) wrote2005-11-30 01:02 pm
(no subject)
Oooh. Meme.
10 things you should know about me
1. I am deathly afraid of feet. They are quite possible the worst thing in the world as far as I am concerned. I've grown comfortable enough to touch my own feet after 26 years, but the idea of touching someone else's feet or someone touching my own feet make me nauseous. Once, Chris had to paint my toenails and I practically had a coronary while he was doing it. I spent about 10 minutes in complete terror at the 48 hour film festival a couple of years ago when someone made a movie about a surgeon without arms who used his feet to operate on people. It was full of close HUGE shots of feet. It was terrible. It's also the one thing that will ALWAYS make me skim a fic or fastforward porn. Because feet are ICKY!
2. I am in need of constant validation because I have low self-esteem. I do things over the top because of this, hoping that someone will say good job. This crosses over from work to fandom to life in general. I get this from my mom. Neither of us are able to do things halfway if there is a chance of someone saying something nice about us. My grandmother screwed my mom up and while my parents did everything they could to make sure I wasn't screwed up like my mom was, it didn't really work because I take so many cues from my mom.
3. The first time I met Chris, he tossed a piece of glassware into the lab sink to release tension. I, because I'm odd, totally fell for him right then. Then I found out he's got a wicked sense of humour and would mock people mercilessly, but would take it all the same. I still tease him about the pump strainer bnasket.
4. I was an English major in college, but I can't stand a good portion of the Dead White Men who are considered classic writers. Nathaniel Hawthorne is just terrible. Melville makes me want to stab my head. Dickens makes me gag. I can go on if you'd like. To be honest, I can't really stand reading most true literature anymore because I was an English major. Fandom has become my major reading source because I didn't feel the need to constantly analyze and re-analyze what I'm reading.
5. I don't like children. Babies frighten me. I cringe in fear and loathing when someone hands me a baby to hold. Yet babies love me. They want to climb on me and sit in my lap. They want to pull my hair and cling to my legs. They seem to think I am fun and love to have them around. I don't. At all. Give me an animal anyday. I am Rodney in that sense. Of course, I will be having one of my own because I do want one - for some reason. And so does Chris. But ugh. I really don't like them and their sticky fingers and messy diapers and amazing lung capacity for something so small.
6. I am a complete and total coffee addict. It's beyond the need for caffeine at this point. I love the taste, smell and sound of coffee so much that it's just one of my favourite things. I go to a coffee roaster to buy my coffee because I'm now a coffee snob. I will drink crap coffee if that is what is around, but I'd much rather buy something rich and fresh roasted that makes my taste buds sing and my shoulders relax. My morning coffee is a luxury that I loathe to give up. My coffee roaster just got in a new coffee three days ago called Brazil Daturra and it's phenomenal. I bought a pound yesterday on scent alone because it had just been roasted and it was so dark and rich and it just smelled like sex. And yes, I equate coffee and sex. I told you I was an addict!
7. I am not a prolific writer any longer. I used to write long, plotty fics that rarely were under 200 pages. The longest story I've written in the past three years was probably 50 pages and that was An Ordinary World which was 2 years ago. I'm nearing 20 pages on an SGA fic I'm writing and that's like holy ground for me lately. I can't concentrate on a single fandom any longer either so perhaps that's part of my lack of writing. When you're trying to balance fic in four fandoms plus various side fandoms, it's not easy to concentrate on any of them.
8. My musical taste is really strange. I really don't like country music, but Gross and Keeley is a guilty pleasure. And Johnny Cash is a god. I can't stand the ambient stuff Chris listens to, but I love Selected Ambient Works by Aphex Twin. I usually don't like really harsh rock music, but I can't get enough of System of a Down. I'm not a big rap fan, but Eminem and Nelly are fantastic. I do still have a soft spot for 50 Cent's Get Rich or Die Tryin' even though I'd really like to kick him in the head. I adore *Nsync and Britney Spears. I own some really, really bad music and I don't ever plan on letting it go. I love my crap stuff!
9. I have a terrible relationship with my sister. It's never been good because I was an only child for so long and she was always a troubled child. She's been diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder with Oppositional/Defiant tendancies. And now her therapist is fairly sure she's Bipolar as well. This does not come as a surprise to any of us in our immediate family or Chris even. She is a holy terror. In the summer of '02 though, she turned my father into the police for marijuana possession and child abuse. Yes, my parents and I both smoke pot, but we never did it around her. And my father has never laid a hand on either of us in anger. I can't stand her and I hate when I have to spend time around her. I've gotten to the point where I can do polite small talk and spend more than five minutes in the same room with her, but I will never, ever forgive her for putting our family through constant hell. The part that scares the crap out of me is that I know I would help her if she really needed it. And the fact that after a lifetime of shit she's put me through, she's still got that type of hold over me, is scary as hell.
10. I am not very good at keeping my life organized. Chris isn't either so our home looks like a tornado hit it pretty much constantly. There are papers everywhere, books scattered about, CDs and DVDs on the ground. Milo's stuff is everywhere. Clothes are in every room, even occasionally the kitchen. I hate this a lot of the time, but I really can't be arsed to do anything about it. I am not a neat person. I can't present an image of someone who is. Image is important, yes, but if I have to spend all of my time keeping my home life in a state of neatness because someone might think less of me, then my home isn't comfortable for me.
And now I go to work and rush around because I'm now running late. Whee!
10 things you should know about me
1. I am deathly afraid of feet. They are quite possible the worst thing in the world as far as I am concerned. I've grown comfortable enough to touch my own feet after 26 years, but the idea of touching someone else's feet or someone touching my own feet make me nauseous. Once, Chris had to paint my toenails and I practically had a coronary while he was doing it. I spent about 10 minutes in complete terror at the 48 hour film festival a couple of years ago when someone made a movie about a surgeon without arms who used his feet to operate on people. It was full of close HUGE shots of feet. It was terrible. It's also the one thing that will ALWAYS make me skim a fic or fastforward porn. Because feet are ICKY!
2. I am in need of constant validation because I have low self-esteem. I do things over the top because of this, hoping that someone will say good job. This crosses over from work to fandom to life in general. I get this from my mom. Neither of us are able to do things halfway if there is a chance of someone saying something nice about us. My grandmother screwed my mom up and while my parents did everything they could to make sure I wasn't screwed up like my mom was, it didn't really work because I take so many cues from my mom.
3. The first time I met Chris, he tossed a piece of glassware into the lab sink to release tension. I, because I'm odd, totally fell for him right then. Then I found out he's got a wicked sense of humour and would mock people mercilessly, but would take it all the same. I still tease him about the pump strainer bnasket.
4. I was an English major in college, but I can't stand a good portion of the Dead White Men who are considered classic writers. Nathaniel Hawthorne is just terrible. Melville makes me want to stab my head. Dickens makes me gag. I can go on if you'd like. To be honest, I can't really stand reading most true literature anymore because I was an English major. Fandom has become my major reading source because I didn't feel the need to constantly analyze and re-analyze what I'm reading.
5. I don't like children. Babies frighten me. I cringe in fear and loathing when someone hands me a baby to hold. Yet babies love me. They want to climb on me and sit in my lap. They want to pull my hair and cling to my legs. They seem to think I am fun and love to have them around. I don't. At all. Give me an animal anyday. I am Rodney in that sense. Of course, I will be having one of my own because I do want one - for some reason. And so does Chris. But ugh. I really don't like them and their sticky fingers and messy diapers and amazing lung capacity for something so small.
6. I am a complete and total coffee addict. It's beyond the need for caffeine at this point. I love the taste, smell and sound of coffee so much that it's just one of my favourite things. I go to a coffee roaster to buy my coffee because I'm now a coffee snob. I will drink crap coffee if that is what is around, but I'd much rather buy something rich and fresh roasted that makes my taste buds sing and my shoulders relax. My morning coffee is a luxury that I loathe to give up. My coffee roaster just got in a new coffee three days ago called Brazil Daturra and it's phenomenal. I bought a pound yesterday on scent alone because it had just been roasted and it was so dark and rich and it just smelled like sex. And yes, I equate coffee and sex. I told you I was an addict!
7. I am not a prolific writer any longer. I used to write long, plotty fics that rarely were under 200 pages. The longest story I've written in the past three years was probably 50 pages and that was An Ordinary World which was 2 years ago. I'm nearing 20 pages on an SGA fic I'm writing and that's like holy ground for me lately. I can't concentrate on a single fandom any longer either so perhaps that's part of my lack of writing. When you're trying to balance fic in four fandoms plus various side fandoms, it's not easy to concentrate on any of them.
8. My musical taste is really strange. I really don't like country music, but Gross and Keeley is a guilty pleasure. And Johnny Cash is a god. I can't stand the ambient stuff Chris listens to, but I love Selected Ambient Works by Aphex Twin. I usually don't like really harsh rock music, but I can't get enough of System of a Down. I'm not a big rap fan, but Eminem and Nelly are fantastic. I do still have a soft spot for 50 Cent's Get Rich or Die Tryin' even though I'd really like to kick him in the head. I adore *Nsync and Britney Spears. I own some really, really bad music and I don't ever plan on letting it go. I love my crap stuff!
9. I have a terrible relationship with my sister. It's never been good because I was an only child for so long and she was always a troubled child. She's been diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder with Oppositional/Defiant tendancies. And now her therapist is fairly sure she's Bipolar as well. This does not come as a surprise to any of us in our immediate family or Chris even. She is a holy terror. In the summer of '02 though, she turned my father into the police for marijuana possession and child abuse. Yes, my parents and I both smoke pot, but we never did it around her. And my father has never laid a hand on either of us in anger. I can't stand her and I hate when I have to spend time around her. I've gotten to the point where I can do polite small talk and spend more than five minutes in the same room with her, but I will never, ever forgive her for putting our family through constant hell. The part that scares the crap out of me is that I know I would help her if she really needed it. And the fact that after a lifetime of shit she's put me through, she's still got that type of hold over me, is scary as hell.
10. I am not very good at keeping my life organized. Chris isn't either so our home looks like a tornado hit it pretty much constantly. There are papers everywhere, books scattered about, CDs and DVDs on the ground. Milo's stuff is everywhere. Clothes are in every room, even occasionally the kitchen. I hate this a lot of the time, but I really can't be arsed to do anything about it. I am not a neat person. I can't present an image of someone who is. Image is important, yes, but if I have to spend all of my time keeping my home life in a state of neatness because someone might think less of me, then my home isn't comfortable for me.
And now I go to work and rush around because I'm now running late. Whee!
no subject
Yet babies love me.
It's like when you're allergic to cats, they climb all over you. Somehow, they just know.
no subject
no subject
no subject
no subject
no subject
no subject
no subject
no subject
bnasket.
no subject
no subject
Oh and the low self esteem thing. Sometimes I do things over the top to feel better about myself.
no subject
good job! :)
I used to date a guy who felt the same way about feet (to a lesser degree, but still). I used to touch him with mine under the covers just to make him mad. He had issues with a lot of stuff. I can sort of understand the foot thing though, even though I don't relate. I'm a bit of a foot fetishist. I LOVE having my feet rubbed. And I love shoes. :)
Re: good job! :)