MUST. KILL. EVERYONE!

[visionshadows]

So earlier this evening, Chris calls me at work and tells me that we have a problem. And the problem is that my sister called our house and asked what I wanted for Christmas. Now. Let's list why this is a problem.

1. My mother gave my sister my home phone number even though she knows I don't want her having it.
2. My sister and her boyfriend will be at the Chrismukah celebration on Sunday.
3. OMG I HAVE TO GET THEM GIFTS!!!

I told Cheryl that she had to come with me to go get gifts. Leah is getting BPAL so she was easily taken care of but there was the boyfriend and the boyfriend's daughter that had to be taken care of. I called Mom and she and Dad had already snagged the easy to get gifts of a Home Depot gift card and a WaWa gift card for the boyfriend. So Chris and I ended up with the Wal-Mart gift card.

Which meant I had to go to Wal-Mart after work on the eve of Christmas Eve.

I will never, ever do this again. Let's list the reasons why:

1. There's NOTHING left!!
2. It's all CRAP!!
3. There's nothing LEFT!!
4. I got separated from Cheryl and didn't have my cell so I was forced to wander through Wal-Mart looking at all the scary, scary people from South Jersey.
4a. I have too many teeth to be from South Jersey.
5. My gift card wouldn't scan and I had to get a gift card that a boy really wouldn't want, but bah! He's getting it. He's a jerk anyway!
6. THERE'S nothing left!!
7. There's not even a good selection of PLAY-DOH left!
8. There was a woman wearing pink and green camo pants, a camo undershirt, a pink half-shirt, a ratty coat that looked like a drowned bear or something, and ugly, ugly boots. It was SCARY!
9. IT WAS WAL-MART ON CHRISTMAS EVE EVE!
10. I spent money on people I don't like AT ALL.


But in the end, it was all fine. I found Cheryl. We smoked two cigarettes to calm ourselves down, congratulated ourselves on not being like those people, and went home. Now I have a nice pint glass of vodka and white cranberry juice, Futurama on my TV, a container of deliiiicious cookies from mickeym, and I never, ever have to go to Wal-Mart on Christmas Eve Eve again.

Comments

[buckle-berry.livejournal.com]

Now I have a nice pint glass of vodka and white cranberry juice

I hear that. I'm relying on alcohol to see me through this whole festive season.

[visionshadows.livejournal.com]

That is definitely how I am getting through Sunday with my sister. Booze, booze, and more booze. And I'm bringing the dog so he can be a distraction for me.

"Oh my, I have to go walk Milo now. Back soon!" [runs]

[fayemeadows.livejournal.com]

4a. I have too many teeth to be from South Jersey.

This would be when I choked on my coffee.

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

Was there a woman with six kids and one kid was wearing the requisite Stone Cold tee-shirt as PJ always mentions when he yaps about hating Wal-Mart?

[visionshadows.livejournal.com]

There were very few kids there. But looooots of people with feathered hair. Also Santa. No. Really. He was wearing suspenders over a green thermal shirt and had a beard that reached down over his very large belly and long white hair. I think he was eating a Snickers while waiting for Mrs. Claus to finish her shopping.

Who knew Santa shopped at Wal-Mart? Does this mean the elves are illegal aliens?

[transientmind.livejournal.com]

OMG you're so right! There really is always at least one Stone Cold shirted kid!

I went to that Wal-Mart at 4am once. It was FRIGHTENING. I'd give details but I kinda blocked most of it out. I just remember that everyone there looked like either a zombie or a crack addict. Or a zombie crack addict.

[mickeym.livejournal.com]

Oh, good, the package got there! :) *hugs*

Yes, just getting caught up on--everything. Bleh.

[visionshadows.livejournal.com]

Oh yes! I looove the package so very much. The cookies were fantastic and the earrings are gorgeous. I've been wearing them for days. *hugs tightly* Thank you both so very much. :)